Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Doncha Just Hate It When...?

Doncha just hate it when you put money in the soda machine, hit the button for a Grape soda, and then you get a Fruit Punch?

Then, of course that would have been the very last quarter you had left in your purse, and that annoying red light on the machine is blazing and screaming right back at you "exact change only." Even though there's a single crisp George Washington uselessly sitting there in your wallet, you probably wouldn't bother wasting it again in the same machine anyway.

Steal my quarter and keep my grape soda once, shame on me. But, take my dollar, keep the change, and still give me another stupid fruit punch...well, that means war and we already know how Washington would handle cherry fruit punch!

Yet, that twenty-five cents war is not nearly enough of a hassle for me to visit Walmart's customer service center and complain. Thirty minutes later, I may or may not have my quarter back, but by then I would be more parched than a piece of parchment paper and still not have my cool, refreshing grape soda!

There's a bunch of disgruntled drink machine refillers out there just laughing their butts off about this, and I imagine that maybe even a few, after having a particularly crummy day on the job, do this intentionally. They pull a soda switch-a-roo, then rush back and hide in the truck just to watch! Seriously, have you ever clocked just how long some of these trucks appear to sit in the parking lot? They're having loads of laughs, however, they don't have to worry about quarters and they can just open up the truck and pick out whatever they want! Since I don't apparently miss a grape soda for a fruit punch, who's going to miss if they want a cola and have a cola?

And you gotta admit. If you were the one doing that same exact job, doesn't that sound even the slightest bit fun? Pepsi tick you off today? Well there, now take that Coke and shut up! That will teach you a lesson! One morning, I might wake up and decide that I don't like the Sprite in you. You need a Mountain Dew instead, ha! Or I might decide that you've already had more than you share of caffeine for the day, so I'll just cut you back to anything else that's caffeine free! Or hey, did Dr. Pepper give you the news? No! Joke's on you as it's a Fanta, Fanta, who wants a Fanta?

If I had a dollar for every drink machine that I've ever wanted to kick box somewhere into next week, I'm certain I could at least have built and patented my very own miniature soda machine that could dispense Grape soda inside my own car without my ever having to bother with quarters again. Now that's a novel idea that I'd be willing to pay money for. A bright flashing GPS button that stands for GraPe Soda! Yet, the one in my car would have to come with sweet tea too. That way, even if I wanted a grape soda, I could settle for a sweet tea without having a fruit punch induced nervous breakdown.

Yeah, I just hate it.

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