More Tomato Tales

The last of the tomatoes are coming in and late yesterday afternoon I picked what will probably be my final bucketful for this year. I thought I was just in time to make one last batch of homemade spaghetti sauce until I realized I didn't have any tomato paste in the cupboard. With two little ones to bathe, read a stack of books too, and tuck in good-night, I decided venturing out to the grocery store would have to wait until tomorrow. So, I left the bright red 5-gallon bucket of tomatoes carefully placed beside the refrigerator in the kitchen.

This morning I really struggled to get motivated. I knew the tomatoes were waiting in the red bucket in the kitchen and I kept telling myself I'd get to them soon...

Soon as the 3-year-old quit throwing legos at his brother. Soon as I mopped up the spilled milk that the little one was eagerly "fingerpainting" with on the kitchen table. Soon as I found out what happened to the little one's missing sock. Soon as I made sure a lego or the missing sock hadn't inadvertently been flushed down the toilet...

As I retrieved the plunger from the toilet and a gleefully squealing toddler escaped past me, I figured I would get to the spaghetti sauce soon...very soon. Ok. The toilet emergency was a false alarm and I was just about ready to put the kids in the car and venture out into public when....

Soon, I heard two peels of laughter and one rambunctious 3-year-old shouting, "Mommy, me are having fun! Me are having fun! Me are playing ball!"

Yep. You probably guessed what the boys were playing ball with.

Here's a funny question for ya...how many tomatoes can two little boys throw across the kitchen and living room in say, all about ten seconds?

5? Nah. Way too few!

10? You're so cold there's icebergs on your toes!

20? Getting warmer.

Last count in rounding them all up? I think it was around 32!

Yeah, I know what you're thinking. How can two little boys do that so quickly? Here's another perspective. Do you know how mad you can get as you round up 32 tomatoes and mop up tomato juice and tomato seeds from the floor, the walls, the carpet, and two little children who have seeds coming out of their ears and their noses?

I was admittedly a tad bit upset and very nearly turned into the Devil Woman Tomato herself again. However, after a stern lecture I quickly got over it. My mother used to say that the punishment should fit the crime.

So, can you guess what my little ones had for lunch today?

Yep. Half sliced and half squished tomato sandwiches.

In our house, food is to eat - not to throw on the floor. However, if you intentionally throw it on the floor you still have to eat it. Depending on what it is, you might also just have to clean it up...can you tell by the "house rules" that we've gone over this at least a time or two?

Needless to say, I think I know two little boys who will probably not be playing ball in the house again, at least with tomatoes.

As I angrily pureed tomatoes at lunchtime, I had to smile. The happy 3-year-old seated at the kitchen table grinned up at me with tomato juice dripping all down his face and all over his clothes. In between mouthfuls he said, "Mommy me is not playing ball. Me is eating tomatoes!" Then, he wanted to know what I was doing and if he could help make "sketty sauce" too.

Sure is hard to stay mad even hours later when I'm still stepping on tiny tomato seeds as I walk through the kitchen. Now, it's getting late and those two balls of energy are sleeping soundly. The stove is on low and there are two large pots gently simmering that I stop what I'm doing to stir occasionally.

Soon, I'll call it a day...soon as the spaghetti sauce is done.

Rotten Devil Tomato, Baby Stringbeans, & Teeny Tommy Toes

Well, as all good things must come to an end so does the life of the "Devil Tomato." However, I do think she was looking most particularly devilish there near the end!

Yeah. I "saved" her until the fruit flies got to be a bit much.

There were, unfortunately, no other interesting tomato demons lurking about the garden.

However, my son, who is almost three, still enjoys toting his "tomato bucket" around in anticipation of trying to find a few end of summer ripe ones. With a rather glum look on his face yesterday he refused to pick any tomatoes. I asked him what was wrong. As he stomped off he shouted back to me, "None of these tomatoes have noses and faces!"

While there haven't been any other tomato devils, there have been a couple other interesting little babies.

This little stringbean baby, is actually two stringbeans which merged on the vine into one lovely and tiny little "fetus." This reminded me of either a Mother Nature or garden variety version of Camille Allen's Marzipan Babies. In case you're not familiar with Camille Allen, her miniature baby dolls are definitely not really made out of marzipan. They're delicately hand-crafted clay sculptures which she creates in limited editions. They are occasionally listed for sale on eBay.

While my doll collection is carefully stored until my small children realize that a Simon Halbig is not translation for, "See mommy, how big!" as something they reach out to touch accidentally breaks, I am in complete awe of the Marzipan Babies. I was equally in awe of this little stringbean baby as well...this is my doll collecting...on a "shoestring budget!"

Though I still think a great idea for a real Marzipan Baby collection would be vegetables, or "Fresh from the Farm." Instead of pink, blue, or white crochet diapers and hats, how 'bout green ones with miniature stems? Twins or triplets in a pea pod? An orange hat and diaper for a new little pumpkin? Yellow for sweet silver queen corn?

Ok. I'll stop. But not until I've shown you one more baby from the vegetable garden.

I call this one Teeny Tommy Toes...

What's so neat about "Teeny Tommy Toes" is that he's still so little that his skin is translucent and you can see his spinal cord!

If you never look at produce the same way again, I will definitely be elated!

Highlights from the North Carolina Zoo in Asheboro

Why's everybody always picking on me?

Am I clean yet?

Mommy, aren't you done already?

Come on mom, the other kids will think I'm odd!

Yeah, that's it. A little bit lower and too the right.

Temporarily Distracted

Just wanted to let you guys know that I have not intentionally stopped blogging.

There's been a lot of activity the last couple weeks here on Cemetery Road and Blogger is currently experiencing a soon to be fixed technical glitch. Due to the glitch, I haven't been able to share any of my latest meanderings as they are all photo related. It seems computers can be just as tempermental as children at times!

No, honestly I'm just ignoring you. Just kidding, though I have been busy working on my thesis and writing some articles for Associated Content. If you miss me, the link to AC is on the page here too.

If you haven't been in this neck of the woods in awhile then you missed the grand South Central fair which was here at Cemetery Road two weeks ago. I have an awesome photo I can't wait to share that has its own personal Cemetery Road flair, yet alas this silly Blogger photo glitch is holding things up. It is certainly a view of the fairgrounds that I've never seen in any traditional media form. So, yours truly feels obliged to share what's really behind the scenes, so to speak. That, and of course it amuses me so I do try my best to return the favor.

My latest adventure last weekend was taking the children on their first official zoo trip. It was a family affair as I think every monkey in the family jungle decided to come along too. Seriously though, it was a lot of fun. We saw giraffes (upclose), elephants, monkeys, zebras, and lots of other animals. I have some great photos to share from the zoo as well.

I'll post again as soon as Blogger fixes the glitch.

The South Central Fair at Cemetery Road

The South Central Fair at Cemetery Road

Each October, the fair coming to town is such a monumental event. Literally.

I simply had to share my favorite view of the fair. Sadly, I don't think I'll ever see this particular view in any of the local newspapers, but it is nonetheless, my favorite view.

I can just imagine all the souls desiring undisturbed rest in peace, that are annually invaded by the week full of noise, music, and wonderful smells. I'm sure there's nothing worse than lying there craving some cotton candy, popcorn, and candy apples, while trying to decipher if that's a side of cow, pig, or chicken wafting alongside of the aromas.

If ever there was going to be a great time to wake the dead, I think the fair would be the ideal situation. However, even ghosts might be rudely awakened at today's five dollar price tag to ride one little silly ride. Instead of the "you must be this tall to ride" signs, they should read, "you must be a broke fool if you spent five dollars on this here thirty second expensive thrill."

Well, I don't really have much room to talk. I spent my five bucks on a virgin strawberry daiquiri and a funnel cake. Best five bucks I've spent in a long time, and now I have this nifty blue and hot pink plastic glass in my cupboard. When it's been a hard day, I refill the glass with whatever I have on hand...kool aid, water, tea, rum and coke, whatever. It really doesn't matter.

Then, I imagine I'm helping to wake the dead. The dead people walking that I wish would just wake up to what's going on around them. The dead brain cells in my head that obviously aren't getting enough oxygen flowing to them. The dead relationships that abound in the distant past. The dead silence that is really haunting. The dead funeral processions that come and go along the roadway. The dead leaves falling off the trees. The dead day. The dead night. The dead romances that sparked on the ferris wheel and smoldered by the time the colorful lightbulbs were turned off well after midnight.

I raise my glass to commemorate a time for every season and I know, the fair will be back next October. Alive with more funnel cakes and strawberry daiquiris.

Full Moon: More Moon Flowers?

The Full Moon was absolutely gorgeous tonight!

There's nothing quite like staring at the full moon on a still, quiet, and crystal clear night. The photo was taken around 11:30pm and the moon was high in the sky. Simply mesmerizing.


I hope the moon flower seeds think so this time too as even if they are picky, they had absolutely no reason to complain tonight.

If you weren't moon gazing tonight than shame on you! No excuses. A clear black sky. A huge luminous moon and not a star or a cloud in sight.

A beautiful night, no matter how you look at it.

If there is such a thing as a perfect night for planting moon flowers, tonight would certainly have been it. I was in such awe of the moon, that I even forgot to sing and chant. I planted seeds.

Then just stared in silence.

There are few nights that take my breath away. Tonight was one of them.

The weatherman said it was going to be in the low sixties tonight, and there was a rustling breeze and just a hint of a chill in the air.

You can certainly tell Fall is well on her way.

I wish there were more nights like this, especially since the addition of the full moon compounds Mother Nature's peaceful lullaby at least by a hundredfold. I will try to make a point to visit the evenings outside a bit more. I had forgotten how invigorating it is to just quietly "be" in the dark silence.

The Man in the Moon, me, and the Moon Flower seeds.

It Only Takes a Spark

It only takes a spark to get a fire going.

I see you little red dots on Clustr Map. Tiny little sparks. Even if I can't hear you, I still see you.

Don't forget...the full moon is tomorrow night too.

Jiffy pellet peat pots, jiffy pellet peat pots, jiffy pellet peas in a pot!

Blogger Play

As I watched a few of the constant stream of images that people are out there uploading, Blogger Play reminded me of playing Hide and Go Seek as a child.

"It" would count a bit too quickly, 1... 2... 3...

Ready or not, here I come!

Then I'd duck behind a tree and pray "It" couldn't see me before I had enough time to reach base safely.

Time after time. The game never got old.

Unfortunately, I could only ever run but so fast and I was lousy at hiding.

Only today, my computer runs slower than molasses, but nevertheless you cannot hide from me. You there. Hiding behind that no longer existent tree...

Tag! You're it!

Doncha Just Hate It When...?

Doncha just hate it when you put money in the soda machine, hit the button for a Grape soda, and then you get a Fruit Punch?

Then, of course that would have been the very last quarter you had left in your purse, and that annoying red light on the machine is blazing and screaming right back at you "exact change only." Even though there's a single crisp George Washington uselessly sitting there in your wallet, you probably wouldn't bother wasting it again in the same machine anyway.

Steal my quarter and keep my grape soda once, shame on me. But, take my dollar, keep the change, and still give me another stupid fruit punch...well, that means war and we already know how Washington would handle cherry fruit punch!

Yet, that twenty-five cents war is not nearly enough of a hassle for me to visit Walmart's customer service center and complain. Thirty minutes later, I may or may not have my quarter back, but by then I would be more parched than a piece of parchment paper and still not have my cool, refreshing grape soda!

There's a bunch of disgruntled drink machine refillers out there just laughing their butts off about this, and I imagine that maybe even a few, after having a particularly crummy day on the job, do this intentionally. They pull a soda switch-a-roo, then rush back and hide in the truck just to watch! Seriously, have you ever clocked just how long some of these trucks appear to sit in the parking lot? They're having loads of laughs, however, they don't have to worry about quarters and they can just open up the truck and pick out whatever they want! Since I don't apparently miss a grape soda for a fruit punch, who's going to miss if they want a cola and have a cola?

And you gotta admit. If you were the one doing that same exact job, doesn't that sound even the slightest bit fun? Pepsi tick you off today? Well there, now take that Coke and shut up! That will teach you a lesson! One morning, I might wake up and decide that I don't like the Sprite in you. You need a Mountain Dew instead, ha! Or I might decide that you've already had more than you share of caffeine for the day, so I'll just cut you back to anything else that's caffeine free! Or hey, did Dr. Pepper give you the news? No! Joke's on you as it's a Fanta, Fanta, who wants a Fanta?

If I had a dollar for every drink machine that I've ever wanted to kick box somewhere into next week, I'm certain I could at least have built and patented my very own miniature soda machine that could dispense Grape soda inside my own car without my ever having to bother with quarters again. Now that's a novel idea that I'd be willing to pay money for. A bright flashing GPS button that stands for GraPe Soda! Yet, the one in my car would have to come with sweet tea too. That way, even if I wanted a grape soda, I could settle for a sweet tea without having a fruit punch induced nervous breakdown.

Yeah, I just hate it.

Did Ya Bring Yer Shovel?

We returned from the shore, though I am still trying to finish laundry, unpacking, and getting rid of the ton of sand that somehow followed us home in toys, swimsuits, and shoes! The weather was beautiful and hot. A bit unbearable a few days as it was over 100* but the breeze from the ocean made it harder to really care about the extreme heat.

Below is my toddler playing at the beach. Yeah, we take shovels everywhere! Did ya bring yers?

This is "Carolina Moon" - absolutely gorgeous and oceanfront! If you're ever in the Holden Beach area this is certainly a lovely vacation home. The children fed seagulls from the upstairs balcony while pelicans flew overhead, ferociously rocked in all the rocking chairs along the porch, and loved the child sized Belize chairs around front!


It was beautiful, but I won't pretend that it wasn't an exhausting week for me. I don't think mothers ever really get a true vacation. Vacation generally just means all the extra work of piling everyone into the car and lugging stuff and yourselves somewhere else to continue your daily responsibilities. Though it is hard to beat looking out at the ocean. It's nice to drift away somewhere where you can just sit and bury your feet in the sand.

For a short while, it was also nice not to worry about the heavy machinery digging in the dirt across our street.

Chicken Noodlin' All the Day - At the Shore

The Chicken Noodles and I are off to the shore! With the car loaded down with enough paraphernalia that will hopefully get us through Friday we are officially headed to the North Carolina shores. Whoever said "Life's a Beach" apparently didn't have two little ones that he was trying to pack up and take there, lol!! Anyway, hope everyone has a great week and I'll post again when we get back.

Thank God for good directions...and Hardee's tea.

Today it was 96 degrees outside in the shade, not to mention humid. It was one of those sweltering muggy days where a person is much happier just sitting inside in the air conditioner. Unfortunately, I didn't have the luxury to sit and soak up the AC.

After being outside much of the hot morning and early afternoon, I happened to drive by Hardee's and read the lettering on the marquee. "32 oz. Sweet Tea - $1" glared at me in large uppercase black letters. Hmm...now that was a thought. However, a quick glance at the long drive-thru line persuaded me to tuck the tired and perspiring dollar bill back into my wallet.

Don't get me wrong. I'm all for driving with all four windows rolled down and letting the wind blow through my hair so I really do look like I never brushed my hair this morning, yet sitting in the stale heat in rush hour traffic, motionless? Nah, I had to pass. That tea sure would have been nice and cold though.

As soon as I had I driven by the small ENTER sign, I regretted my hasty decision. The marquee sign seemed to be calling my name, screaming come back, and it instantly felt ten degrees hotter. Then, Billy Currington started singing "Good Directions" on the radio. As I sat at the stoplight, waiting for it to turn green, Billy sang:

" She went way up yonder past the caution light
Don’t know why, but somethin’ felt right
When she stopped in and asked Miss Bell for some of her sweet tea
Mama gave her a big ‘ol glass and sent her right back here to me...."

Yeah. It didn't help.

An hour later, I flipped country music stations only to hear Billy Currington crooning about that big 'ol glass of sweet tea again. Damn it!! The only cloud of dust that I had disappeared into was the one related to cleaning lake houses in the 96 degrees heat and fifteen miles farther away from that sweet tea! I just hate it when I'm more hard-headed than Hollywood!

What seemed like an eternity later, the kids went to grandma's so my husband and I could enjoy our first "date night" in almost four months. He suggested a movie. I told him I'd fall asleep in a dark theater within the first twenty minutes. He suggested a nice dinner and listed off a few choices. I started to laugh. He wanted to know what was so funny about going out to dinner. I tried to explain how a 32 oz sweet tea for $1.00 at Hardee's had been calling my name all day. He reluctantly gave in to my request but he wasn't happy about it.

Since neither of us really wanted to run into anyone we knew in our small town, we actually drove 20 miles to the next town over to have dinner! As we pulled into a completely vacant Hardee's parking lot at 7:30pm on a Saturday night, I started to laugh again. With a buy one, get one free Thickburger coupon in hand, we waltzed into a quiet and empty Hardee's and ordered. Burgers, curly fries, and two big 'ol 32 oz glasses of sweet tea.

We sat down and waited for our order to be brought to our table. We sat there. In silence. Complete silence. For once, I had absolutely nothing to say and I didn't care. I felt so completely giddy on the inside as I waited in anticipation of that big 'ol glass of sweet tea. No children screaming. No laundry to do. No dishes to do. Just silence. And tea.

When the burgers arrived, I didn't even care that somehow the burger maker had screwed up. I laughed hard at my two bottom buns and my husband's two top buns. I joked that the burger guy must have been entirely too busy to know what he was doing particularly since he was so overwhelmed with customers! It didn't matter. I switched him a bottom for one of my top buns and that problem was easily fixed.

We ate in silence. The best $8 and some change that we've spent in months! The only thing that made it better was the 32 oz free refill of sweet tea I stopped to get on the way out!

Thank God for good directions...and Hardee's tea.

An ABC Friendly Dilemma

The three day hiatus also presented a bit of a moral dilemma. What would you do? Comments are certainly welcome.

Friend A and Friend B have been best friends since they were children. Enter Woman 1. Friend A and Woman 1 have a child together but never married. They went their separate ways for a number of years by their own mutual choosing. Out of the blue, Friend B runs into Woman 1 and tells Friend A about it. Friend A then starts talking to Woman 1 again, mainly because she was brought back into his attention by Friend B. Woman 1 plays hard to get with Friend A, while in the meantime sleeps with Friend B. Woman 1 and Friend B mutually decide never to tell Friend A about their "relationship" as it would really hurt him. However, Friend B brags about Woman 1 to friends C, D, and E...who also happen to be friends with Friend A also. If you were friend E, what would you do?

XYZ, PDQ ?

The Case for Lowercase L

I recently came across the blog lowercase l. Until reading a few of the entries, the case for lowercase l had not previously crossed my mind. However, while on my three day hiatus what did I happen to meet? Well, nothing short of my very first lowercase l sighting!!! I'm so excited that of course I had to share! Would you like to buy some lowercase l pot?

Do check out the lowercase l blogspot to explore some more lowercase l sightings while you're at it. And don't worry- I'm forwarding my own lowercase l sighting to their blog as well! What's that? Up there on that sign? It's a bird? It's a plane? It's an alien flying in a ClAY POT? Why, no...it's uh....a lowercase l!!!

Lowercase L sighting by the side of the road outside of Pamplin, VA.
lG pots $3.00. SM pots $1.50

The Chicken Noodle Escape

I am soon to be escaping from the land of Chicken Noodles. I am excited. Who am I kidding? I'm jumping up and down, fighting to contain my excitement! Now that's more like it!! I am heading out into the real world of grown-ups with one infant in tow. After dropping the toddler off at grandma's, I am boldly going where I have not been able to go for at least the last eight months. First, I have a meeting with my thesis advisor and then I'm off to visit my sister and a couple of my fabulous single girlfriends whom I have not had the pleasure to really "visit" with since baby number two arrived. My three day hiatus is largely due to some timely house repairs. So, tonight I am thankful that when I turned on the air conditioner back in June some little plastic thingy-a-ma-bob cracked, water leaked, and chunks of drywall came plopping down into the bedroom. It was certainly not funny at ten o'clock at night, but on the eve of my welcomed departure I find it incredibly fantastic! The only vacation I'm taking this year is because the bedroom ceiling has to be fixed before it caves in! Since things generally do tend to come crashing down on me here lately, I have decided that I should not press my luck. Anyway, the hiatus, no matter how short, is indeed a good thing. I will miss cemetery road probably until the end of the week, but it will be in my thoughts.

Revenge of the Refrigerator

1 crying (hungry) + 1 sneaking (thirsty) = Revenge of the Refrigerator.

Since I couldn't factor in two additional seconds or at least another 1/2 of myself, the results of today's equation equal one small disaster. Or today, revenge of the refrigerator. Yep. It only happens when I clean.

Did you know this little fella could get the refrigerator door open and pour his own cup of juice? Nope. Neither did I. Learn something new every day. I don't understand- how did absolutely NOTHING end up in his cup?

Oh, by the way, grape juice was in "his" pitcher. The purple can soda is not his, nor is he allowed to drink it. The crawdaddy has to have caffeine every now and then. Yes, he does have one shoe off and one shoe on. Yes, the shoe is on the wrong foot. No, I don't let him run around naked. I dressed him earlier. Twice. He then decided to redress himself, obviously according to his own taste- grape.

Diddle diddle dumpling...

Baby Think It Over...Really!

Last Sunday, I commented about the Baby Think It Over Program by Reality Works.

Today, I have another thought to add. Below is two days worth of laundry at my house. With an infant and a toddler, welcome to reality.

Hmm... Reality works?

Sunflower Sunday

Have a Happy Sunflower Sunday!

Roads Less Traveled

Here's a few photographs of actual road signs for you to enjoy:

Shades of Death Road

Fucking (Austria)

This Way to Dildo

We couldn't survive without Wikipedia now could we?

"Yeah."

Dead Polls of the Week

Be sure to stand up, roll over, crawl, shake your booty thang, or what not and be counted in the Dead Polls of the Week.

What is your preference regarding your own funeral?

What is your favorite type of Noodles?

(Psst...if you have an answer that's not available, but certainly should be, shoot me a quick email and I'll try to add it for you!)